Jimmy Smithers Ladyboy Roundup

Recently, one of Professor Ng’s literally handful of mentally unstable readers posted a comment on the public lavatory wall that is his website regarding William Mahanakorn and ladyboys. When Saphan Loy attempted to post a response to this extraordinarily perceptive insight, Professor Ng did not publish it. Apparently when it comes to defending the good name of William Mahanakorn and Saphan Loy, Professor Ng’s “unhidden” agenda makes itself more plain, which is fine, considering the fact that our team of lawyers is currently becoming intimately familiar with communications law in the State of California. And his arbitrary use of censorship further discredits his dubious operation.  It is clear Professor Ng would rather defame, defraud and impersonate us than give up a little of his largely useless digital space for our acerbic response to Mr. Smithers.

So we started to think about Jim Smithers, the putative commentator and armchair psychoanalyst in question. And the more Saphan Loy considered the matter, it appeared that ladyboys, and those who find them interesting, are an underserved part of the nightlife scene in Thailand and in elsewhere in Asia. Stickman has featured their services prominently since they advertise on his site, and Professor Ng has shared photographs of ladyboys on his own site. So why not Saphan Loy?

A new feature is coming to Saphan Loy: Jimmy Smithers' Ladyboy Corner

In the spirit of Jimmy Smithers’ (Sigmund Freud/Professor Ng’s) accusation, then, Saphan Loy is introducing a new feature called “Jimmy Smithers’ Ladyboy Corner, a part of the saphan loy from which to view the goings (and comings) of ladyboy admirers like Smithers (and Stickman and Professor Ng for that matter). In this feature, we will search the web for the most appealing, or most repellant ladyboys we can find, and, as you know by now, write pointless essays for your pleasure. But for this feature, we have emailed Jimmy Smithers directly asking for his input. Here is his response in its entirety, uncensored with no hidden agenda:

Thank you, William Mahanakorn, for the opportunity to write about my favourite topic: Thai ladyboys. As you know, because of my pronounced limp and my corrective left shoe, I usually have a problem finding real women in my home state of Georgia (Woo hoo, go Bulldogs!). Also, because of my chronic scalp problems and halitosis, I am not the most popular guy when cruising the shopping mall on Saturday nights. But what’s to stop a guy from trying? Besides, I think the Old Spice cologne helps. I buy it in bulk.

I am proud to write about Bangkok’s ladyboys. Professor Ng never asked me to write a longer article like you have. So what’s my experience? I’m glad you asked. Although I have been robbed on many occasions, I can’t keep out of Cassanova in Nana Plaza. I am like a moth to the flame, I guess. In this article, I plan to discuss ways to avoid being robbed by a ladyboy, how to disguise your prosthetic device(s), creative ways of concealing a scalp problem/baldness, ladyboy etiquette (who’s on top?), selecting the right personal lubricant, and how to impress your ladyboy with nice Thai gifts, like durians. I will also talk about more intimate moments, like when to unload and go, or when to kneel and bob, or how to deal with post-sex anal leakage.  I know, none of this is on the web yet. So we will try hard to bring it to you, only on Saphan Loy.

I think most of my colleagues at the discount tyre center and family members are okay with my adventures in Thailand. Aside from the robberies and physical assaults, I have had a few memorable moments with the ladyboys of Bangkok. I’ll never forget the time when a wig came off during a bareback bj, but even with the shattered illusion and the ruined mood, I just laughed it off as one of the many pitfalls of the scene. But with all of my experiences, I am confident you can avoid this too. So, let’s be frank: I will not try to make a buck off of my experiences. And neither will William Mahanakorn and Saphan Loy. You will get fair and balanced accounts of the latest and hottest ladyboy action in Thailand. So keep your eye out on this site, and a hand on your wallet at all times, and we will pave the way to hot ladyboy action in Asia, any time, all the time. 

“That’s our story and we’re sticking to it…”

No wait.

“But I don’t give a hoot…”

Let me try again. Bear with me on this.

“No hidden agenda, no censorship, no bullshit.”

Wait, that’s not quite right either.

“Your Bangkok commentator….”

Damn, taken.

“Thanks for stopping by, people…”

No, not what I am looking for….Wait for it:

She’s no lady. He’s a ladyboy!
Jimmy Smithers, Your Real Lady(boy’s) Man.

The View from Above

   

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4 Responses to “Jimmy Smithers Ladyboy Roundup”

  1. I am quite certain that you will find willing co-plaintiffs, once your lawyers get all their information and details lined up. You know where to find me.

    • It is becoming clearer that the Big Mango Bar has potentially a very strong case in the US court system against the professor. Even in the land of granola and medical marijuana (California), the consensus on freedom of speech and the Internet is a bit more in favour of the wronged than the Big Baby Kenny would care to admit. Professor Ng, whether he knows it or not, is really skating on thin ice. Our best guess is that he is teaching his last semester at the university, and that a forced retirement or furlough is near. We will, of course, break it here when the announcement is released.

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