Archive for blogging

Big Baby Kenny Ng: New and Improved Website!

Posted in สะพานลอย with tags , , , , , , on May 17, 2012 by สะพานลอย

Saphan Loy is disheartened  to learn that the Big Fat Baby Kenny Ng has reappeared on the world wide web, much to the discredit of the university system of California, its tax payers and supporters, and the hardworking and earnest undergraduates who deserve far better in their matriculation. For those of you who haven’t seen the new and improved Big Baby Kenny site with shocking new features, click here to witness the dismal and depressing spectacle.

On another note, perhaps the reappearance of his tawdry site may lead to an overall improvement in its writing, or the continued showcase of his award-winning photographs of impoverished bar girls. We would also like to remind you that the Big Fat Baby is about to embark on his summer sojourn to the land of sex milk and honey. Should an eagle-eyed observer spot the buffoon staggering  from bar to bar in Nana, on Cowboy, or in Patpong, Saphan Loy and others are prepared to dispense not an insignificant amount of the coin of the realm for a candid photo shot of the celebrity blogger where he is most at home:  in a third-world brothel.

The View from Above

“Sticks” and Stones

Posted in สะพานลอย with tags , , , , , , , , , , , on October 4, 2011 by สะพานลอย

This week, Stickman took aim at nearly every writer on the Thailand brothel-scene who does not plaster his site with antiquated banner ads or molly coddle sex tourists in Thailand, calling these writers, bloggers, and various forum lurkers “weirdos”, “shit-stirrers”, etc. With all of the self-righteousness of a Catholic school boy, Stickman’s attacks left Saphan Loy wondering whether he is the right man for the job of pitching to his motley collection of readers places like Demonia, Devil’s Den, Lolita’s, Ladyboy Escorts, Big Mango Bar and others. Were we an advertiser on his site, we would be somewhat concerned: someone with a foot fetish is “on another wavelength”? What does that mean? There are those of us (like Jimmy Smithers and Big Baby Kenny Ng) who adore ladyboys and have foot fetishes. I know for one that Jimmy Smithers was so profoundly offended by the Stickman’s rambling tirade that he nearly incapacitated himself with an overdose of Wild Turkey and Pepto-Bismol.

Meanwhile, when not feigning astonishment about other people’s sexual predilections (foot fetishes, ladyboys, etc.), his bleeding heart reaction to some German drifter really takes the cake. I mean, really. Freud would have a field-day with the utter irony represented by his entire website. It is clear that Michael, the German drifter, who clearly suffers from schizophrenia, was sucked into the vortex of the very kinds of places advertised on the Stick-site, then suffered the consequences of a lost mind and an empty bank account. The only way the German embassy will intervene, incidentally, is if Michael dies on the street, or is murdered, or asks for help himself. Surely, the consular officers have better things to do with their time than read the Stick site. How can you even be sure he is German? He may even be a spy whose cover is a homeless sex addict with a mental illness.

So is the Stick biting the proverbial hands that feed him? Were I an owner of Demonia and had an event like the foot fetish event (that looks quite intriguing) mocked as being perverted or, as he puts it, “on another wavelength”, or were I an owner of Big Mango Bar and had my place called the “coldest bar” in Bangkok, Saphan Loy would seek other advertising venues that were kinder and gentler.

In targeting other writers on the Thailand scene, the Stick makes it clear that anyone who diverges from the pat and glib “gosh golly” tone that he effects when dealing with a very serious subject matter (i.e., sex tourism and transnational promotion of prostitution) is thus labeled a “weirdo” or a “shit-stirrer.” It goes to show that in New Zealand, political correctness of a different sort rules the roost and the freedom of expression is but a vaporous mirage of western European and North American ideals that enshrine the right to free speech. Furthermore, we now know the following about Stickman:

  • He doesn’t bar fine.
  • He doesn’t like ladyboys.
  • He does not have a foot fetish.
  • He prefers to take his mother to Soi Cowboy.

Just who is Stickman Bangkok? And why doesn’t he start a blog about another topic, one which he is more qualified to write about? Like the homeless situation in Bangkok, or the dangers of freedom of expression on the Internet, or teaching English in a language mill, or just how perverted foot fetishes are? Better yet, how about a little blog about rugby. See how many banner ads he can sell for that project, thus avoiding the “nasty” characters that comprise his readers.

Jimmy Smithers, Big Baby Kenny Ng, and Dean Barrett love bare feet.

Because Saphan Loy was embarrassed for the Stick by his latest blunder of a column, we are listing (gratis) the Big Mango Bar (which is not the coldest bar in Bangkok) and Demonia in our Views You Can Use section. The ladies of Demonia may thank me with a solid ass-whipping and the privilege of licking their bare toes.

The View from Above

Buying a Brothel, Legal Recourse and Big Baby Kenny Ng

Posted in สะพานลอย with tags , , , , , , , , , , , on April 25, 2011 by สะพานลอย

First, a word of caution to Professor Kenneth Ng, who continues to violate copyright protections by blatantly stealing proprietary content. Here, in its entirety and unedited, is a fabrication that Professor Ng has published on his dubious blog and has libelously accredited to Saphan Loy:

The “bar” business is prostitution clear and simple. Any claim there is any reason men spend money in lower sukhumvit bars except to conduct business with prostitutes is blowing a smoke screen. Own a lower sukhumvit bar that has girls on staff and you are smack dab in the middle of the biggest whore and brothel industry in Asia.

Hypocrites bar owners that claim they are not taking advantage of impoverished young girls are lying clear and simple. Money goes directly into their pocket everytime a girl goes home with a customer for sex and money goes indirectly into their pocket everytime a girl drink is bought and the John buys a drink for himself.

The class of individual the ownership in the brothel business atrracts, and, surely The Big Mango fits the brothel definition, are what you would expect of individuals who choose to make their living as middlemen for young girls forced by their poverty to sell their bodies. These are the lowest scum of humanity. A bank robber has a greater claim to the moral high ground than a Sukhumivit bar owner for they are only taking peoples money not their self respect and human dignity.

Sunbelt Asia should also be called out for aiding and abetting these businesses by allowing them to adveritse on their site and for making a commisiion of their sale.

Decent people, like myself, should refuse to have anything do with them professionally, financially, or personally.

I do.

Before I impart Saphan Loy’s wisdom on what Professor Ng is attempting to do with regard to the Big Mango Bar, a bit of legal clarification (at the advice of my team of salivating lawyers). First, there are changes in the legal environment in the United States (which has the legislative and Constitutional authority to uphold protections for writers of all backgrounds) that will allow much simpler methods for beginning the process of litigation against Internet frauds like Professor Ng. Anonymously. The reason that our team of well-heeled lawyers is salivating is that, by extension, the entire university system of California (hence the State of California) may soon find itself on the hook for Professor Ng’s nefarious campaign.

To wit, the blogger (in this case, Professor Ng) is now effectively responsible for all posted commentary due to amendments in the shape of the current law. (Our team of lawyers likes to giggle when they say this.) In the most basic terms for the layman, it means that Saphan Loy in the near future may file a lawsuit anonymously against Professor Ng, the California State University at Northridge, and (by extension) the State of California. While it is difficult to tabulate total damages that we will seek, the upshot is that a payday is clearly forthcoming. My team of lawyers will have little difficulty in proving, by way of the functionality of WordPress, that Professor Ng’s ridiculous methods of plagiarism are illegal.

Secondly, deciding what to do with the windfall will prove difficult. Invest in a bar? There are only two reasons to invest in a bar/brothel. The investment itself is just an adolescent fantasy akin to the idea of “buying a casino”. Any institutional investor knows that one should never make an investment for “emotional reasons.” The only rational reason to purchase a bar/brothel, therefore, not only in Bangkok, but anywhere in the world for that matter, would be to offset profits or capital gains from other sources of investment income in order to claim allowable tax deductions (thus calculated as business loss) against other, more lucrative investments. Perhaps the owners of the Big Mango Bar have already done just that. The only secondary reason for investing in a bar in Bangkok (assuming that the conditions of the first rational reason are met) is that you are alcoholic, in which case purchasing beer from yourself at inflated prices (and claiming the loss against other investment income) illustrates very good business acumen. It is always nicer to let other investors, shareholders, friends, lovers, silent partners (or the semi-retarded sex tourists who arrive by the plane-load) pay for (or subsidise) your bar tabs.

At any rate, Professor Ng’s campaign against the sale of the Big Mango Bar (if it is even, in fact, for sale, which hasn’t been established as a fact) would be utterly illegal in the United States. By interfering in free market dynamics, Professor Ng is exhibiting his Chinese ethnic proclivities. The Chinese are notorious scofflaws and vice-peddlers when not yoked to a powerful and nominally Communist system. The reason that China has been thriving as an economic powerhouse is that it is tightly controlled by a severe taskmaster of a government. It is precisely what the Chinese people need. Otherwise left to their own devices, prostitution, opium, gambling, and pornography would likely corrupt the entire society in short time, and arrest any hope for an enlightened progress founded on capitalism. The second reason the Chinese are so “successful” is that whatever they cannot produce industrially, i.e., intellectual capital, computer technology, etc, they simply steal through corporate espionage.

So what are Professor Ng’s objectives in fabricating Saphan Loy’s viewpoint regarding the sale of bars in Bangkok? First, the old man has been pounding away at his university-supplied computer terminal for an entire year about the Big Mango Bar and he is increasingly frustrated by what he cannot achieve under his own name or through legal recourse. There are obvious pressures he is facing from the university’s Board of Regents, and California itself is essentially bankrupt. He is incapable of thinking about anything else, but he takes the time from his busy teaching schedule to draft literally hundreds if not thousands of obscene comments hoping to strike a nerve somewhere, somehow. To maintain tenure, isn’t it important to actually publish something other than a blog? His modus operandi has already been outlined by others, and it is pretty sophomoric and uniquely Chinese in its application. Note how he lured John Galt to the site with a somewhat retarded “tribute”, then subjected him to the same treatment by then falsifying his writing.  

Secondly, unsatisfied with his assaults on the Big Mango, he seeks to drag in Sunbelt Asia, a business brokerage, to which we say to him, good luck, Professor. While Saphan Loy has been critical of Professor Ng and other writers who seek profit from the bar industry, we are not, after all, socialist. Contrary to Professor Ng’s casuistry, Saphan Loy is agnostic to the motivations of bars, brothels, casinos and the like. And taking a stand against industrial reality, i.e., the ubiquity of the nightlife industry around the world, is like throwing a pebble at a warship.

Finally, in all his froth about the Big Mango Bar, hasn’t anyone noticed that the photograph of the girl with arms raised in apparent victory that Professor Ng published is actually quite young looking? Has she signed a model release in the United States? Is she even 18 and can therefore legally consent to the reproduction of her image? Does she have legal recourse against the State of California as well? (My salivating lawyers want answers to these questions.)

Saphan Loy will keep its readership abreast of our legal efforts. In the meantime, let’s hope that Professor Ng had a nice spring break. And should he attempt to recreate Saphan Loy’s protected content in future, he should at least subscribe to the rules of grammar and capitalization. At the very least, perform a spell-check.

The View from Above

Dissecting a Frog Bar and Other Curiosities

Posted in สะพานลอย with tags , , , , , , , , on April 13, 2011 by สะพานลอย

One of the strengths of WordPress (shameless plug for the platform) is that it alerts the author to all sorts of interesting Internet metrics. For example, our profile on the hot ladyboy action that the Stickman wrote about over at the Frog Bar in Pattaya has become a search engine result for the terms “dissecting a frog.” Saphan Loy apologises in advance to frustrated biology students everywhere who were hoping to find an easy answer for their lab assignments concerning the anatomy of the Rana esculenta.

Another perplexing development in the red light blogosphere is the revival of a previously moribund URL. Thanks to the diligence of the folks over at BigDummyKenny (soon to be renamed) and also to evidence of incoming links from the old URL, a bit of a digital curiosity has emerged from the wreckage of the former Werewolf’s Lair. After he abandoned his efforts and wrote an occasional, awkward post for the Big Mango Blog, the Werewolf put up a bizarre children’s site mockup (see below regarding Saphan Loy’s views of the subject of children). The old ghost link has now been reanimated and is called “mundane Bangkok” complete with a sidebar of crosslinks. Why Saphan Loy was omitted from this list is a mystery (and we take offense at the oversight).

So what’s the new blog about? Absolutely nothing. The syntax is clearly not the fabled Werewolf. The style is not quite right for him, so our theory is that he handed over the keys to the URL to someone (an elderly sex tourist) he met in a bar and said, “Good luck.” If the Werewolf had wanted to reintroduce himself to the world, why not start with a new URL? The old one is just plain awkward anyway.

What is to be discerned from the content of the new site? First, the writer has not been in Thailand “for 40 years”.  Fair enough. That puts him squarely in the Vietnam War veteran demographic, presumably an American whose first experience of the country was on R&R, or serving at one of the airbases in the boondocks. He may have now retired to Thailand  (or at the very least visits often), which he finds “mundane.” Ho hum. In Saphan Loy’s estimation, his “non-agenda” constitutes an agenda, so the reader should be wary. The very first post (some bland and not very original observations about Songkran) features, of all the possible mundane topics at his disposal, a conversation with children.

A word of advice to anyone posting information about Thailand for public consumption, particularly on an old URL (called bargirlsrpeople2) that once trumpeted the benefits of multiple sex partners culled from the red light districts. Avoid the subject of children like the plague. They are to be seen and not heard, not only in Thailand, but all around the globe.

That said, we wish the second “boring Bangkok blogger” the best of luck and a happy Songkran. And if you truly feel that Bangkok is either “boring”  or “mundane”, perhaps you might consider a holiday somewhere you may find more to your liking. Like, say, Disneyland.

Artist's rendering of proposed Disneyland in Shanghai

The View from Above

The Big Baby Kenny Disaster: Oh, the humanity!

Posted in สะพานลอย with tags , , , , , , on March 25, 2011 by สะพานลอย

The Precipice of Disaster

One of the more interesting aspects of blogging, and the ways in which it has altered the digital landscape, is they more or less require constant refreshment. A morbidly dying blog needs dramatic resuscitation in the event of its immenent collapse. It will shed readers fast if it is not constantly refreshed. That the more popular Thai nightlife blogs ignore the refreshment rate necessary to preserve and multiply readership is strange: Stickman refreshes his paid advertisement (weekly blog) every Sunday, William R. Morledge and Dean Barrett refresh once a month preferring the colours pink and purple, and assorted “old media” types are even less frequent. What is clear is that those who do update regularly (Big Dummy KennyMobithailand, Big Mango Bar blog, and Bangkok Buddy) typically see sustained growth in numbers because they are satisfying market demand. In fact, BDK’s site has surpassed BBK in numbers and has essentially shifted the playing field in its favor. BBK’s neglect has cost him readers and, in the long run, has turned his site into a virtual wall of graffiti: not unlike the walls of a shitter in a public men’s room. Perhaps this is the effect the professor is looking for? For a good time, call…

It has been clear for some time now that the BBK blog has been abandoned to all but a few lonely, schizophrenic and probably homeless men posting commentary from a public library somewhere. A high limit poker room? Hardly. More like an uncomfortable teacher’s lounge at a large, mediocre state university, where tense, resentful smiles are exchanged in lieu of pleasantries. 

In reviewing the blogs this week, sadly Mobithailand is also lamenting a precipitous drop in readership, including his own personal friends. It turns out that living a sober life in Pattaya is not all that inherently interesting. Poor Mobi  has resorted to posting pictures of his well-groomed pets. At any rate, Saphan Loy is still a loyal reader, even if his other readers would like him to go on a binge and drunkenly careen his car into a poorly-constructed bamboo beer bar at four in the morning.

Sukhumit Psycho is now peddling a guide to massage parlours in Bangkok (in addition to something he calls “premium content.” ) Saphan Loy did not realise that having one’s testicles rubbed with coconut oil is such an obstacle for some sex tourists, but apparently it is. We would like to get our hands on a review copy, obviously, but for moral reasons, we are unwilling to pay a single baht and thus subsidise such “market research.” If you have a copy you’d like to share for review, please contact us. But let’s wish him the best of luck…there are masseuses all throughout Thailand who are relying on a steady stream of eager and aroused customers who are unable to articulate in Thai (or their own language, or sign language, for that matter) that they would like the genital region included in the cost of the “traditional” oil massage. And that they are unwilling or unable to pay more than twenty dollars.

The View from Above

The Big Baby Kenny Unhinged: The Economics of Mental Illness

Posted in สะพานลอย with tags , , , , , , , , on March 18, 2011 by สะพานลอย

Not since Emil Jannings appeared as Immanuel Rath, a professor completely corrupted and humiliated in the “The Blue Angel” (1930) has a man been reduced to such disgraceful levels of indignity. Big Baby Kenny Ng, once an enthusiastic scribbler of his night-time adventures in the far-flung bordellos of the world with Asian women less fortunate than himself, and boring reviews of Thai restaurants in the United States, has been reduced to an only marginally sane loose cannon, converting his Thai nightlife blog into something that mirrors his deranged fantasies and has become a bully pulpit that reveals instead the depths of depravity that the red light districts of Southeast Asia helped to create.

from The Blue Angel (1930)

Foregoing the actual writing of content, the economics professor has instead written long indecipherable screeds against Stickmanbangkok (who represents the pinnacle —  or nadir, if you will — of success in the whole sordid niche market of brothel writing), self-authored commentary that reveals the identities of his enemies (whether real or imagined), all the while denigrating homosexuals, prostitutes, and women generally in the multiple voices of a fictional cast of characters. Reading the literally dozens of self-authored commentary is like reading the transcript of someone who suffers from paranoid schizophrenia, sexual obsession, and terrifying delusions. Ignorant of new federal laws that protect against digital harrassment and impersonation, Ng focuses his enmity on other writers and bloggers by disclosing personal details, Facebook account information and actual photographs of his putative enemies. Topics include the 9-11 conspiracy, anal sex, sexual relations with university students, and anti-Semitic colloquialisms.

What is clear from this mess is that the California State University system allows such great latitude for its professors. Freedom of expression is certainly protected within the US Constitution. But the kind of degeneracy posted on is without any veneer of narrative or academic structure, cohesion, and comprehensibility. It is accompanied by exploitative photographs of women who have not signed model releases in the United States, and whose images reveal instead reluctant victims, dancing for the depraved desires of a lonely sex tourist starved for affection.