Archive for sex tourist

2012 Stumbles to an Ignominius End

Posted in สะพานลอย with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 30, 2012 by สะพานลอย

….and 2013 looks no better for the motley group of fools who continue with their dubious output of words and poorly framed photographs depicting the brothel districts of Thailand, from the disgraced professors and teachers (Big Baby Kenny Ng and Stickman), to the humdrum typists of pulp e-books which nobody purchases (Stephen Blather et. al.), to the marginally retarded (Bangkok Buddy and Kent Hammond). Normally, Saphan Loy would conduct a “blow-by-blow” analysis of the year in review, but sadly, it seems that the whole year was a washout for the barflies of Bangkok.

The holiday season in Thailand’s red light districts is a grim reminder that there are many lost souls from around the world who continue to gravitate to these places, washed up has-beens, lovelorn, hopeless, and thirsty, compelled by the biological imperatives of their unmanageable vices, motivated by the squalid reward of a short-time hotel room, a cheap sex enhancement drug, and a Thai rice farmer’s daughter or two. Or a Thai rice farmer’s son in drag who happens to possess an artificially added set of double DDs and a chemically induced uncircumcised hard-on, or a surgically altered vaginal skin-fold.

It is a time when our favourite bar girls, mamasans, and bartenders are trotted out in the cheapest of Christmas-themed lingerie and paraded around sticky barroom floors in darkened corners of cheap, third-world gin mills, enticed by a few hundred baht and the false promise of an improvement in their stations in life.

It is the time of year to drown regrets in rice whiskey, or the local non-potable lager, and to stifle the merest threat of an emerging sense of conscience, any images of domesticity that we left behind elsewhere in the developed world where we once may have had friends and family, or even the thought, “What the hell am I doing here?”

It is also the time of the year when we can imagine, although remotely and through the artifice of fiction, a character much like George Bailey, driven to despair by financial catastrophe in the timeless American classic It’s a Wonderful Life, who attempts suicide only to be shown a life without his presence in the world, followed by a dramatic, heart-warming redemption.

We can picture, for example, Professor Big Baby Kenny Ng, clinically depressed by the mistakes of his life, his failures as an economist/school teacher, his morbid obesity, his disgraceful and very public fall from grace, and his grotesque appetite for young Thai bargirls, contemplating suicide on a barstool somewhere in Saphan Khwai (yes, he has sunk this low), while drunkenly crying in his cups and muttering dark curses at his imagined enemies and the success of others. Yes, we can see him, his ego stung by the utterance of a snaggle-toothed ladyboy who has just called him a khii mao, in this Saphan Khwai hellhole, his life story spooling away from him like the sad and sordid conclusion to an old 16 mm stag film he vaguely remembers from his misspent youth witnessing the fabled Tijuana donkey show flickering on a yellowing wall in his dorm room.

And we can hope, as we watch him in this Saphan Khwai watering hole, trying to find an outlet for his laptop and arguing with the mamasan in a language he does not understand, that Ng will come to meet an angel who will put his arm around his shoulder and say, “But you have had a wonderful life, Professor Ng.” And when this dreary holiday fable comes to its conclusion in the darkened karaoke parlor, and those grim concluding words appear, “Remember, no man is a failure who has friends”, we will all sigh deeply, because, well, we know how Ng has mistreated his friends and alienated his colleagues irreparably.

My lovely assistant Lek is in tears, daubing at her almond eyes with a Kleenex, the poor thing. Ok, enough of your blubbering. Get me a drink. And put on that skimpy Father Christmas costume I purchased for you.

Similarly, we can wish at this time of year that the celebrated scribe of the red light districts, the Stickman, is visited by a Dickensian scene, the bar girl of Christmas past, who appears to him in his Bangkok high-rise bound in the chains of oppression that he has caused by stimulating a prurient interest in all things related to sex commerce. Awakened at midnight by the apparition, the Stick cowers under his mosquito net, while the bar girl of Christmas past says, “You handsome man no good man. You bad man.

Stickman is awakened at midnight by the bar girl of Christmas past.

The Stick mistakenly believes he is dreaming, and responds, “Is that Bernard Trink?”, then swallows another tranquilizer. His slumber thus returned, he is awakened soon thereafter by the bargirl of Christmas present, who shows him the horrid reality of plane-loads of elderly westerners arriving in Bangkok, all streaming into the big yellow vagina of Nana Plaza, depositing their baht along with their diseased chromosomal material, and leaving empty beer bottles and broken lives of the impoverished girls who remain behind staring hopefully at the dim glow emanating from their cellphones.

And finally, what of the bar girl of Christmas future? What tidings does she bring? Or he? And whither the red light districts in Thailand in 2013? Only the new year will tell. Lek has visited the witch doctor and received bad tidings. But I am optimistic. And rest assured gentle reader. In an ever more hostile cyber world, Saphan Loy will continue to be a “troll-free zone” and will remain a place where intelligent, adult discussion of all things Thai brothel districts is welcome, where sexpats and sex tourists can tune in for the latest deep analysis of the red light blogosphere and the bizarre bedfellows who populate it.

Therefore, may you and your bar girls or ladyboys (or donkeys) enjoy the best of the holiday season, and with hope look forward to another year of unabashed whoring and drinking and drugging all the while avoiding liver failure or cardiac arrest. And may all of your wishes at the Hindu shrines of Bangkok bring you the loves of your life, prosperity, and just enough success to continue your binges without guilt, shame, or remorse of any kind.

Happy New Year!

Yours truly, and my lovely assistant Lek.

The View from Above

Bangkok Eyesore Revisited

Posted in สะพานลอย with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 19, 2012 by สะพานลอย

Recently, Saphan Loy paid a visit to William R. Morledge to see how his little corner of Bangkok has been and to determine via textual analysis whether he has kicked his Ketamine habit. What we discovered there, in that luridly designed throwback to the dawn of World Wide Web page construction, was that it is clear that the Ketamine has taken its toll, and much like Dean Barrett (another geriatric “webmaster”), whose rants about Muslims are bizarre reminders of his mental deterioration, has resorted to a long paranoid essay on the arrival of “Big Brother”, the collection of online data in vast server farms, and the ability of the television set to transmit signals directly to his brain.

The content of the latest Morledge essay is in striking contrast to the normally banal photographs of neon signs that had been his hallmark for many years. It indicates to Saphan Loy that, in effect, his mental illness has had a sudden onset, and it is only a matter of time before he is transferred to the funny farm where he may spend the remainder of his days heavily medicated, drooling, staring at his shoes, and cutting his salisbury steak with a plastic, unserrated knife.

Evidence of a diseased mind at Bangkok Eyesore.

Just who is this Morledge character?  William R. Morledge is an example of what naturally happens after prolonged exposure to the red light districts of Thailand. It may even be the result of tertiary syphilis, which attacks the brain of the infected individual in its final, untreated stages. One wonders, really, if Morledge, Dean Barrett, Big Baby Kenny Ng, Stephen Blather, and Chris Coles have formed a support group for those coping with the disease, as their collective output seems to show clear signs of the affliction.

Nonetheless, there is something intrinsically disturbing when one stumbles upon the website of a deranged “webmaster”, to use Stickman’s oft-repeated phrase. Since websites and blogs about Thai red light districts are often the haunt of the lonely, the unstable, and the sociopathic, when their creators evidence the kind of madness found at Bangkok Eyesore, it shouldn’t come as much of a surprise. After all, one can sustain a lifestyle predicated on congress with people in an illegal transnational sex trade for only so long. But in our years of reportage on the red light bloggers, “webmasters”, scribblers, dabblers, peddlers, doodlers, barkers, punters, pushers, bunglers, and farters, William R. Morledge is illustrating the rule rather than the exception.

Big Baby Kenny Ng’s Site Just Got Dirtier.

Speaking of infected scribblers, Saphan Loy would be remiss in not mentioning that Professor Ng’s site has been zapped by an ugly bug, the kind that does not respond at all to antibiotics. As BDK has published, the site is appearing in all major search engines as something that could harm your computer, whereas before, a visit to BigBabyKenny merely insulted one’s intelligence.

For the record, Saphan Loy does not condone cyber attacks of this kind. But were we to make a prediction, it would be that, because these kinds of problems are often intractable, and given Ng’s dogged persistence in making an ape’s ass out of himself, we would look for an all new Kenny Ng URL in the future and a squeaky clean slate, since that is usually what happens when one has been surfing the Internet looking for Hot Anal Asian Action, and discovers that the tasty thumbnail depicting a Tokyo stewardess ravaged by black men instead delivers a nasty venereal surprise directly to your hard-drive.

The View from Above

Big Dummy Kenny v. the Royal Thai Government

Posted in สะพานลอย with tags , , , , , , , , on April 2, 2012 by สะพานลอย

Loyal readers who were seeking their daily dose of Big Baby Kenny Ng-directed fun were greeted with a sternly paternal message from the government of the Kingdom of Thailand. For those of you who cannot read Thai, my lovely assistant Lek provided us with an excellent translation, while massaging the lower back and buttocks. It basically says that in coordination with the hosting company, the government has blocked accesss to the site as a result of “inappropriate” content. What that inappropriate content might have been is really anyone’s guess. Saphan Loy believes that the more egregious “inappropriate content” may be found over at bigbabykenny.com, and it will likely be dealt with by the authority vested in the State of California, or at the US federal level soon enough.

Strangely, Big Baby Kenny Ng then posted an article celebrating the government-mandated take-down, only to remove that post quickly, likely out of cowardly fear of retaliation or some similar kind of reprisal. It would seem that Professor Sexpants has a vested interest in celebrating the censorship of the Big Dummy Kenny, and why he does not do so at this rather opportune time is a mystery. But Saphan Loy has long since given up speculating about the workings of the Ng-brain. It is disturbed, feeble, and morally repugnant. As ever, Saphan Loy will keep you abreast of events as they develop.

The View from Above

Make a Sexy Time!

Posted in สะพานลอย with tags , , , , , , , , , , on March 10, 2012 by สะพานลอย

Make a Sexy Time!

Two young women cavort in a Thai karaoke parlour with Professor Ng.

It is clear that Big BabyKenny Ng does not know how to configure a database, or understand its relationship to his website. He is down again, and, although it is about 10 am in California now, he is probaby just sitting down in his tattered terry-cloth bathrobe to his glass of red wine and a copy of the LA Times. He should probably rouse himself with a cold shower and get to his keyboard to undo the damage that he has done to his abomination of a website. (snicker snicker)

The View from Above

Resurrection of the Fat Man: Big Baby Kenny Ng

Posted in สะพานลอย with tags , , , , , , , on March 9, 2012 by สะพานลอย

He has been resurrected. Thankfully, all of our favourite images are still there as well. His extraordinarily perceptive photographic skills, his keen eye for the salient details of the Thailand “dating scene” as he calls it, and his highly detailed and piercing ethnographic descriptions of the brothel districts of Thailand, have all been restored to their former glory.

Professor Sexpatriate clearly has a compulsive need to continue his sorry puppet show. Saphan Loy will keep you abreast of the situation, as always.

The View from Above

Requiem for the Fat Man

Posted in สะพานลอย with tags , , , , on February 29, 2012 by สะพานลอย

Not with a bang but a whimper. — T.S. Eliot

The Big Baby Kenny Ng has been knocked off the airwaves, and we are hopeful that the cause was his own guilty conscience.  He should find solace in the fact that he joins a long list of personalities who for a brief moment illuminated the world with their insights into the brothel districts of Thailand by lighting a candle rather than curse the darkness:

  • Bernard Trink
  • Dean Barrett
  • Werewolf
  • Baron Bonk

Murati Shrine, Courtesy of BigBabyKenny.com

UPDATE

Sadly for the students and taxpayers of Califronia, as well as the citizens of the Kingdom of Thailand, the BBK disaster has returned to the airwaves. It is likely that the Fat Man tripped over the webserver power cord, or spilled some beer all over a particularly important piece of system hardware, or hit the wrong key on his keyboard with his Mongoloidal ham-fists. Saphan Loy will endeavor to keep you informed should anything even more egregious result from that depraved part of the United States.

The View from Above

Buying a Brothel, Legal Recourse and Big Baby Kenny Ng

Posted in สะพานลอย with tags , , , , , , , , , , , on April 25, 2011 by สะพานลอย

First, a word of caution to Professor Kenneth Ng, who continues to violate copyright protections by blatantly stealing proprietary content. Here, in its entirety and unedited, is a fabrication that Professor Ng has published on his dubious blog and has libelously accredited to Saphan Loy:

The “bar” business is prostitution clear and simple. Any claim there is any reason men spend money in lower sukhumvit bars except to conduct business with prostitutes is blowing a smoke screen. Own a lower sukhumvit bar that has girls on staff and you are smack dab in the middle of the biggest whore and brothel industry in Asia.

Hypocrites bar owners that claim they are not taking advantage of impoverished young girls are lying clear and simple. Money goes directly into their pocket everytime a girl goes home with a customer for sex and money goes indirectly into their pocket everytime a girl drink is bought and the John buys a drink for himself.

The class of individual the ownership in the brothel business atrracts, and, surely The Big Mango fits the brothel definition, are what you would expect of individuals who choose to make their living as middlemen for young girls forced by their poverty to sell their bodies. These are the lowest scum of humanity. A bank robber has a greater claim to the moral high ground than a Sukhumivit bar owner for they are only taking peoples money not their self respect and human dignity.

Sunbelt Asia should also be called out for aiding and abetting these businesses by allowing them to adveritse on their site and for making a commisiion of their sale.

Decent people, like myself, should refuse to have anything do with them professionally, financially, or personally.

I do.

Before I impart Saphan Loy’s wisdom on what Professor Ng is attempting to do with regard to the Big Mango Bar, a bit of legal clarification (at the advice of my team of salivating lawyers). First, there are changes in the legal environment in the United States (which has the legislative and Constitutional authority to uphold protections for writers of all backgrounds) that will allow much simpler methods for beginning the process of litigation against Internet frauds like Professor Ng. Anonymously. The reason that our team of well-heeled lawyers is salivating is that, by extension, the entire university system of California (hence the State of California) may soon find itself on the hook for Professor Ng’s nefarious campaign.

To wit, the blogger (in this case, Professor Ng) is now effectively responsible for all posted commentary due to amendments in the shape of the current law. (Our team of lawyers likes to giggle when they say this.) In the most basic terms for the layman, it means that Saphan Loy in the near future may file a lawsuit anonymously against Professor Ng, the California State University at Northridge, and (by extension) the State of California. While it is difficult to tabulate total damages that we will seek, the upshot is that a payday is clearly forthcoming. My team of lawyers will have little difficulty in proving, by way of the functionality of WordPress, that Professor Ng’s ridiculous methods of plagiarism are illegal.

Secondly, deciding what to do with the windfall will prove difficult. Invest in a bar? There are only two reasons to invest in a bar/brothel. The investment itself is just an adolescent fantasy akin to the idea of “buying a casino”. Any institutional investor knows that one should never make an investment for “emotional reasons.” The only rational reason to purchase a bar/brothel, therefore, not only in Bangkok, but anywhere in the world for that matter, would be to offset profits or capital gains from other sources of investment income in order to claim allowable tax deductions (thus calculated as business loss) against other, more lucrative investments. Perhaps the owners of the Big Mango Bar have already done just that. The only secondary reason for investing in a bar in Bangkok (assuming that the conditions of the first rational reason are met) is that you are alcoholic, in which case purchasing beer from yourself at inflated prices (and claiming the loss against other investment income) illustrates very good business acumen. It is always nicer to let other investors, shareholders, friends, lovers, silent partners (or the semi-retarded sex tourists who arrive by the plane-load) pay for (or subsidise) your bar tabs.

At any rate, Professor Ng’s campaign against the sale of the Big Mango Bar (if it is even, in fact, for sale, which hasn’t been established as a fact) would be utterly illegal in the United States. By interfering in free market dynamics, Professor Ng is exhibiting his Chinese ethnic proclivities. The Chinese are notorious scofflaws and vice-peddlers when not yoked to a powerful and nominally Communist system. The reason that China has been thriving as an economic powerhouse is that it is tightly controlled by a severe taskmaster of a government. It is precisely what the Chinese people need. Otherwise left to their own devices, prostitution, opium, gambling, and pornography would likely corrupt the entire society in short time, and arrest any hope for an enlightened progress founded on capitalism. The second reason the Chinese are so “successful” is that whatever they cannot produce industrially, i.e., intellectual capital, computer technology, etc, they simply steal through corporate espionage.

So what are Professor Ng’s objectives in fabricating Saphan Loy’s viewpoint regarding the sale of bars in Bangkok? First, the old man has been pounding away at his university-supplied computer terminal for an entire year about the Big Mango Bar and he is increasingly frustrated by what he cannot achieve under his own name or through legal recourse. There are obvious pressures he is facing from the university’s Board of Regents, and California itself is essentially bankrupt. He is incapable of thinking about anything else, but he takes the time from his busy teaching schedule to draft literally hundreds if not thousands of obscene comments hoping to strike a nerve somewhere, somehow. To maintain tenure, isn’t it important to actually publish something other than a blog? His modus operandi has already been outlined by others, and it is pretty sophomoric and uniquely Chinese in its application. Note how he lured John Galt to the site with a somewhat retarded “tribute”, then subjected him to the same treatment by then falsifying his writing.  

Secondly, unsatisfied with his assaults on the Big Mango, he seeks to drag in Sunbelt Asia, a business brokerage, to which we say to him, good luck, Professor. While Saphan Loy has been critical of Professor Ng and other writers who seek profit from the bar industry, we are not, after all, socialist. Contrary to Professor Ng’s casuistry, Saphan Loy is agnostic to the motivations of bars, brothels, casinos and the like. And taking a stand against industrial reality, i.e., the ubiquity of the nightlife industry around the world, is like throwing a pebble at a warship.

Finally, in all his froth about the Big Mango Bar, hasn’t anyone noticed that the photograph of the girl with arms raised in apparent victory that Professor Ng published is actually quite young looking? Has she signed a model release in the United States? Is she even 18 and can therefore legally consent to the reproduction of her image? Does she have legal recourse against the State of California as well? (My salivating lawyers want answers to these questions.)

Saphan Loy will keep its readership abreast of our legal efforts. In the meantime, let’s hope that Professor Ng had a nice spring break. And should he attempt to recreate Saphan Loy’s protected content in future, he should at least subscribe to the rules of grammar and capitalization. At the very least, perform a spell-check.

The View from Above